[Checks watch] ... yeah, I know I'm late. Let's see if I can recap the weekend. Notes:
- Ladies, when giving out your phone number, please be sure to (a) spell your name right and (b) put in all 10 numbers to the phone. 'Course, we all know no one would ever give li'l ol' me a fake number. Hmm ...
- Along those lines, if you have tips for what to do when you have a name and number in your phone that you don't recognize, I'm all ears. Apparently (there's that word again), I met a young lady sometime this weekend who put her number into my phone, and I haven't the slightest idea who she is. Lovely. I even googled the name. No dice. Maybe I'll put up some flyers.
- I get bonus wingman points for my work on Friday. I spent a good hour+ talking to a young lady, while my buddy hit on her friend. He did the follow-up call, and has a date next week. I, on the other hand, put in my time talking to her friend while the woman I was really interested in kept making eye contact from across the bar. First rule of Top Gun - never leave your wingman ...
- This same friend is sorta new at being single in a way. He recently lost a lot of weight, and looks quite a bit different, but he's still kinda nervous inside about women. So, I get a call every other day or so for advice. How's that for funny? My advice ... don't listen to anything I say. Heh. He seems to be doing ok so far ... he's got two dates with two different women the next two weeks.
- Have I mentioned how much I like Portside? Well, I do ... so there.
- So, what's the protocol when you're talking to someone on the phone and walking home, and you have to whizz? Do you call them back? Hold the phone away from the noise? Celebrate it? I think I just kept on talking, although that takes some real skill, especially if you're balancing a pizza or something silly like that.
Here's some math for you. How funny the show The King of Queens is all depends on how hot Leah Remini is at the time. Early in the show, she was a tad chubby, and the show was somewhat funny. Then, she got hecka hot, and it was hilarious. Now, she's doubled her weight, and the show kinda sucks. I guess it's possible that I wasn't watching the show for the humor, too. Me? Watch a show just for the hot woman on it? Never!
I just found out that The Jeffersons theme song had the line "Moving on up, to the East side". All this time, I thought they were moving on up to the SKY. Wow. I thought I was dumb now, but I used to be REALLY dumb before I acquired that info. Weezy.
Weird stuff. All through high school, I wanted to see Billy Idol live, and something always came up when he would come to my area. So, he's coming to Baltimore, and what am I doing? Going to my high school reunion in Indiana that weekend. Frick!
But, on the other hand ... Beck is coming! Yeeeeeeaah! I'm am there, and I am square, baby. Saw him for the Midnite Vultures tour, and he's good, quality stuff live. If you like Beck, check it.
I just finished watching Donnie Darko and ... well ... I didn't get it. Anyone have the Cliff Notes or something for that thing? Funny thing is, I kinda liked the movie for some odd reason.
All week I've been thinking this in my head when I see somebody: "Hey, homeboy, where ya been? Ain't seen ya around Burger World lately." If you don't already know, that's the opening line to Weird Al Yankovic's video "Fat", which is a parody of Michael Jackson's "Bad". Disturbing, eh? It's no wonder women give me fake numbers!
Oh, and I wish upon all wishes that I had written the article in the link below, because it's phenomenal:
- Ladies, when giving out your phone number, please be sure to (a) spell your name right and (b) put in all 10 numbers to the phone. 'Course, we all know no one would ever give li'l ol' me a fake number. Hmm ...
- Along those lines, if you have tips for what to do when you have a name and number in your phone that you don't recognize, I'm all ears. Apparently (there's that word again), I met a young lady sometime this weekend who put her number into my phone, and I haven't the slightest idea who she is. Lovely. I even googled the name. No dice. Maybe I'll put up some flyers.
- I get bonus wingman points for my work on Friday. I spent a good hour+ talking to a young lady, while my buddy hit on her friend. He did the follow-up call, and has a date next week. I, on the other hand, put in my time talking to her friend while the woman I was really interested in kept making eye contact from across the bar. First rule of Top Gun - never leave your wingman ...
- This same friend is sorta new at being single in a way. He recently lost a lot of weight, and looks quite a bit different, but he's still kinda nervous inside about women. So, I get a call every other day or so for advice. How's that for funny? My advice ... don't listen to anything I say. Heh. He seems to be doing ok so far ... he's got two dates with two different women the next two weeks.
- Have I mentioned how much I like Portside? Well, I do ... so there.
- So, what's the protocol when you're talking to someone on the phone and walking home, and you have to whizz? Do you call them back? Hold the phone away from the noise? Celebrate it? I think I just kept on talking, although that takes some real skill, especially if you're balancing a pizza or something silly like that.
Here's some math for you. How funny the show The King of Queens is all depends on how hot Leah Remini is at the time. Early in the show, she was a tad chubby, and the show was somewhat funny. Then, she got hecka hot, and it was hilarious. Now, she's doubled her weight, and the show kinda sucks. I guess it's possible that I wasn't watching the show for the humor, too. Me? Watch a show just for the hot woman on it? Never!
I just found out that The Jeffersons theme song had the line "Moving on up, to the East side". All this time, I thought they were moving on up to the SKY. Wow. I thought I was dumb now, but I used to be REALLY dumb before I acquired that info. Weezy.
Weird stuff. All through high school, I wanted to see Billy Idol live, and something always came up when he would come to my area. So, he's coming to Baltimore, and what am I doing? Going to my high school reunion in Indiana that weekend. Frick!
But, on the other hand ... Beck is coming! Yeeeeeeaah! I'm am there, and I am square, baby. Saw him for the Midnite Vultures tour, and he's good, quality stuff live. If you like Beck, check it.
I just finished watching Donnie Darko and ... well ... I didn't get it. Anyone have the Cliff Notes or something for that thing? Funny thing is, I kinda liked the movie for some odd reason.
All week I've been thinking this in my head when I see somebody: "Hey, homeboy, where ya been? Ain't seen ya around Burger World lately." If you don't already know, that's the opening line to Weird Al Yankovic's video "Fat", which is a parody of Michael Jackson's "Bad". Disturbing, eh? It's no wonder women give me fake numbers!
Oh, and I wish upon all wishes that I had written the article in the link below, because it's phenomenal:
posted by AxnJxn at 8:59 AM
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