"Moron", Jarts, Pop Rocks
Current mood: sanely deranged

Beverly Hills! That's where I want to be! Living in Beverly Hills! Hey, those are my good 'friends', Weezer! Weezer and I are tight as hell, because they are on my friends list. We'll probably go out for drinks after I get off work. Good ol' Weezer.

Ok, today's first topic is the word "moron". Now, I know I do a lot of moron talk on here, but that's because there are sooooo many of them. But, today isn't about morons, per se, it's about the word oxymoron. See, my first thought upon waking today was about that word, and why the word "moron" is inside of it. I mean, you could put anything in front of moron, and it's going to bring it down. Geniusmoron, Magnificentmoron, Boobmoron (which is sort of an anti-oxymoron in itself). So, I feel for the oxy- prefix today, since it's being associated with moron.

Ok, so the first two paragraphs have been moronic. Let's see if it can get worse!

Is there some reason that, as an adult, I still sometimes hold it when I have to go whizz? When I was a kid, it was mainly because I didn't want to stop what I was doing at the time (playing Jarts, riding my bike, being molested by Michael Jackson ... damn! I promised no MJ references this time!). Now, I think I'm just lazy. I don't do the "I've got to pee" dance anymore, though. I'm not sure at what point I lost that one, but it's out of the repretoire. 'Course, if you've ever seen me dance, you might not agree - I often look like I have to go to the bathroom on the dance floor. You know that cute li'l saying "Dance like no one is watching"? How about "Dance like you have to whizz". Works for me.

Speaking of Jarts, I heard they took those things off the market because someone caught one in the head. Now, if that isn't somewhat comical (unless, of course, you happen to know the Jart catcher), I don't know what is. Imagine walking around the family picnic with a big orange dart sticking out of your head. If you don't know what Jarts are ... go look up the word "moron". Heh. Just kiddin'. I'm sure Google can answer that, because I'm too lazy to explain it.

Along those lines, remember when it was a fact that Mikey from the Life commercials died by eating Pop Rocks and drinking Coke? Rumor was he just blew up. I mean, that rumor was rock solid fact at one point, and no one questioned it for a second. Speaking of Pop Rocks, my college roommate's father sold them for a living, and we used to get cases of them and put them in shots. Rule of thumb ... Pop Rocks are cool going down ... they ain't so good going back up. Think of hurling a fiery acid stream, and you get the idea. Not so good. They don't pop as well upon regurgitation, either.

So, I got on the elevator today after this dude and a couple of other people. I reached over to push my floor button, and he said "Which floor?" to everyone (being nice to us, doncha know). I had already pushed my button, though, so I said "I don't like people pushing my buttons". He didn't laugh. I think I might be a little strange. News flash!

Beverly Hills! Damn. That's going to be in my head alllll friggin' weekend. Weezer, won't you let me be!?

I had two different people yesterday tell me that I don't look like my pictures at all. Now, when they said this, I asked if that was bad or good, and they both just seemed perplexed. I even offered to re-create the pose for one person, but they declined. Figures. I have no idea what this means, so if anyone wants to bring some insight into this phenomenon, I'm in. I guess in the end, I'm visually confusing ... so I've got that going for me.

So, the dude that invented taco salad just accidently dropped his taco, right? It broke apart into a mess, and he scooped it onto a plate and changed the name. That's the only thing that makes any sense.

Ok, I'm off to the weekend. Be good, Johnny!