Cat mopping, geographical stereotypes, infomercials
Current mood: slowly speeding

A'ight, it's Friday. Strap on your seatbelts, and let's go!

Cat tip of the day ... any time you mop the kitchen floor, it's suddenly time for the entire cat population in the household to have a meeting in the kitchen. Oh, and if you pick up their food and put it on the counter for easier moppin', that's a complete fiasco. The reaction is akin to not feeding them for 17 weeks.

I just got an email from a friend who's in Alaska. Now, I've never been there. Dunno about you, but I have visions of places I've never been that are incredibly stereotypical. F'rinstance:

- Italy ... I assume all people in Italy are chubby, jolly, and are running around with plates of pasta and meatballs. All the men have cheesy mustaches, and wear those big puffy hats that chef's wear.
- Alaska ... a penguin on every corner, and polar bears galore. Oh, and snow everywhere. And everyone eats Klondike bars. No idea why.
- Russia ... lots of grumpy people drinking vodka and eating potatoes.
- Seattle ... everyone's drinking coffee in the rain, listening to grunge rock, and no one over the age of 30 is allowed in the city.
- Los Angeles ... you can't see very well, because you keep getting poked in the eye by boob implants.
- Asia ... billions and billions and billions and billions of people riding around on bikes and eating raw fish. Did I mention the billions of people?
- Australia ... a vast wasteland of dust, with koala bears and kangaroos everywhere
- Poland ... a whole bunch of people trying to screw in one lightbulb
- Wisconsin ... everything is made of cheese, even the houses
- Sweden ... everyone's skiing and all the women look like ice sculptures
- Iceland ... have you ever seen Superman's home? That's Iceland
- Kentucky ... a bunch of hillbillies without shoes, sitting on their front porch, drinkin' moonshine and pickin' and grinnin' ... wait, that's actually true ;-)
- Intercourse, Pennsylvania ... um ...

In other words, I'm pretty much an uncultured dope. Not that that's new information to anyone.

So, here's a weird thing. What's the protocol for passing someone on the sidewalk? I don't mean passing them going in opposite directions, but when someone is walking slower than you are and is in front of you? Do you give them a wave as you go by? Pat 'em on the can? Tell them to speed it up from behind?

I got stuck behind two slow women yesterday, and it took about a block to find a passing lane area. So, for an entire block, I had to walk really slowly, and pretend like I wasn't a stalker. Wait, I'm not a stalker. Anyway.

Is there a more underrated band from the 80s than Simple Minds? They had one of the biggest songs of the 80s, a couple of really solid albums, a ton of big hits, and a cool lead singer. What's not to like? Here's the opening lines from one of their better songs:

Summer's gone, winter's in your eyes
I can feel the thunderstorms inside

Good stuff.

On Wednesday morning, I woke up at 3 am for no apparent reason, and couldn't get back to sleep. Now, when you wake up at this time of the night/day, there is absolutely nothing to do. Nothing. Basically, you can watch infomercials or stare at the ceiling. So, here are the infomercials I saw:

- the Ab Lounge. Now, I enjoy watching these workout infomercials for the chicks, so I don't really know what the Ab Lounge is about. I'm guessing it's a place to take a date for drinks.
- the Bowflex one with the 50 year old lady with the great bod. Hmm ... um, see above. I think it has something to do with bows. Or flexes.

Actually, those were the only two I watched before I started surfing the Internet.

Along with that, cat reaction is always hilarious when I get up that early. They give me a look like "uh, what the hell are YOU doing up?", then they start panicking. You know, running around, putting the remote controls back, turning off all the lights, closing the fridge, returning my car keys.

Ok, I'm off to the weekend! Yahoo!