Let's talk about bus drivers. I was thinking about one I had the other day, for whatever reason. I guess crack really gets your imagination running. We had a dude when I was really young, and he would call out your name when you got on the bus. It was pretty cool, sorta like being introduced on a talk show. F'rinstance, he would stop at this one place to pick up a couple of kids, and as each one got on, he'd call out their names:

Dan!
Mary!
Tommy!
Dina!

And they'd roll on the bus and off we'd go. He was also missing a few fingers from each hand. His "real" job was raising razorback pigs, which I guess is an easy way to lose fingers. Or something.

We also did this little tune when we were on the bus. It was one of those never ending things, and it went like this:

All: Beulah stole the cookies from the cookie jar!
Beulah: Who me?
All: Yes you!
Beulah: Couldn't be!
All: Then who?

And Beulah would name a name and off we'd go on another round. It was kinda pointless, but it did make me want cookies. Thank God for Cookie Crisp cereal to tamp down that craving.

A note about cats. If you get depressed, cats can sense it, and they have a solution for the depression. Pet 'em. They figure the best way to make you happy is for you to pet them and make them happy. It doesn't really work, but it's pretty comical to watch. For those who don't get cats, there's your tip. That's the epitome of the cat mind. They also think those fake mice are real, and will chase them to all ends of the house.

The weekend was fairly tame for me. Friday, skipped the happy hour stuff, had a big old rock concert at home, got quite tipsy, and went straight to Portside. Portside was kind of a bummer on a couple of levels. First, one of my favorite bartenders has switched hours or something, so she's no longer there. In her place, there's some dude that gives me weak drinks in a short glass. Ugh.

As an extra added bonus, not only was Darla there (she of the telling everyone I slept with her when I didn't), but Lindsay was also there (she of the one date and no return of messages). Maybe I should just use these nicknames in their names ... you know, like the Native Americans do with Running Bear and that sorta stuff. There's Darla Who I Didn't Sleep With and Lindsay Who I Digged But Screwed Up First Date.

I did talk to a few women ... one notable one was this beautiful woman named Nabba. A tidbit of the convo:

Me: What's your name:
She: Nabba.
Me: Um ... Nabba?
She: Yes
Me: How do you spell that?
She: [spells it]
Me: Oh, so like Abba with an N? I'm sure you've never heard that before.
She: Yes, that's correct. Um, I think I need to go talk to my friends now.

Heh. Ok, I talked to her for a little longer than that, long enough to find out that she lives in Columbia with her parents, but that was pretty much it. Too bad, because she was quite purty and so were her friends. She was either way too sober or I was way too drunk. Or maybe she just didn't like me. Bah! That's impossible! She was clearly too sober.

I also talked with this woman from the gym who I think is quite attractive. She seemed very happy to see me (no, she didn't kiss my hand ala Leah Hot, but she did give me a good hello handshake/hug sorta thing), so I told her I'd be by to talk to her as soon as the game was over. The game ended, I went to talk to her, and she informed me that she has a boyfriend. I really think I must've damaged my female radar when I fell down the stairs - I seem to be missing lots of obvious things lately, and it would follow that I'm not seeing other things that I should. That would also make sense, because I did fall on my ass, which is where I'm pulling a lot of this stuff. At least she told me early on, rather than wasting my time. Props to her for that.

Saturday, I woke up and was in one of the foulest moods ever. Yech. A good workout at the gym helped change that, but it was pretty ugly. I pretty much chilled the rest of the day. I considered going to The Horse at least 20 times to see Ed and Frank and the former Sometimes Jerome but, in the end, I stayed home and watched an absolutely horrendous movie - Very Bad Things. I'm still in awe over just how bad it was. It's neck and neck with Eyes Wide Shut as the worst movie ever in Jack World.

Fortunately, I did see a pretty good movie earlier in the day - The Rules of Attraction. It's a movie based on the novel by Bret Ellis Easton, who is one of my favorite writers - if you don't know him, think Less Than Zero and American Psycho. One bonus of the movie was I got to see James Vanderwhatever ... that dude that was in Varsity Blues ... make out with another dude. I can safely say that was something I wasn't expecting.

Similar day today - gym, then home for hoop watchin' and cat pettin'. I managed to get video of Batman doing his thing where he taps me with his paw when he wants more petting, but it keeps timing out when I try to upload it to Myspace. Frick! I do have visual proof in the form of pictures, but the video is even better. One of these days ...

I also didn't shower either day. Oh yeah, I stink like nobody's business! Sometimes, it's just fun to have a good funk going. Ok, it's a guy thing, what can I say? As a bonus, the hot neighbor wants to go for ice cream tonight, and I don't think I'm going to clean up at all. I'm very proud.

Congrats to George Mason ... that's some cool mofo stuff right there!